See you at the BBQ !

Some new clients tell me about their previous experience with attorneys. They felt their attorney was a bit too chummy with the other attorney. Seeing people act friendly to each other during the worst crisis in your life drums up a picture: the two attorneys having a BBQ, laughing, and making secret deals to "screw" you and line their pockets with money.

I am frequently conflicted over this - I want to be courteous and friendly to everyone. At the same time I want to be a loyal, aggressive representative for my client. I believe in the old saying: you can catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Being mean to the other side makes them dig in and fight harder. Ultimately, that is bad for me and bad for my client.

Sometimes judges hate certain cases

There are some cases that make judges sick. Thoses are the cases that neither party is willing to give an inch. The whole thing is locked in an endless battle. The kids are frequently caught in the middle. And attorneys are stuck between wanting out - and not willing to abandon their client.