Fear Drives the Process

In the traditional gender roles, fear drives the process. The women worry that will end up on the street without a source of support. The men worry they will be turned into an ATM card while their spouse lives a life of luxury. I think everyone thinks the worst - fueled by television, movies, and a million friends that have gone through a divorce.

More often than not I feel hardened to their fear. I know the process is one of compromise and that life will ultimately go on. Situations pass and life continues. I am a positive person and I try to transfer that feeling to clients. Some of the most rewarding moments happen in mediation. In the beginning the fear hangs on everyones faces. After a successful mediation, everyone starts to crack a smile. They realize the worst didn't happen. Honestly, I wish I could enjoy their relief. But sometimes, all I feel is is fatigue from being so deeply immersed in someone's life.

Life is a Time Machine

A client came into my office today and said something about reading all of my blog posts. I must admit, I felt a bit invaded for a moment. You can see by the date of this post - I have not posted to or read through this blog for 3 years !!!

I remembered my writings in this blog and their personal nature. Somehow, over the past three years I have developed a hard shell - kind of like an M & M candy, but less sweet. I had stopped expressing myself in the same way as the person that wrote this blog, so long ago.

This evening I sat down to read the blog and realized the valuable thing I built. I had created the software version of a time machine. I now have the ability to look into the past and see the inner mind of the stranger that used to be me.

There is a value to all of this. I now plan to return here at intervals and post my thoughts.